March 21 - April 19 - A good day to wait for Owner to use the bathroom without latching the door. Barge in and watch.
April 20 - May 20 - You're more than likely to jump onto the counter top, slide across to the far side, and knock the coffee maker into the sink. Best thing is just to stay on the bed.
May 21 - June 21 - We're sure glad there's two of us, so Owner never knows who to blame for that hairball on the Oriental rug.
June 22 - July 22 - We really like that cheap cat food the best, but it just isn't right to allow Owner off easy. Complain until she puts down the good stuff, then
go for the cheap stuff.
July 23 - August 22 - If it's alive, today's a good day to bring it to Owner's bed. Spiders, mice, anything we can find.
August 23 - September 22 - You've been one class A witch all week and Owner is about to walk you over to the nearest ethnic food mart, so today's a good day to just back off and purrrrr.
September 23 - October 22 - We don't want the best. We don't want the most. We want it all
! After all, it's only fair...
October 23 - November 21 - There's a new kitten in the house, cuter than we will ever be ever again. Shove it down the laundry chute.
November 22 - December 21 - A new cashmere sweater, isn't that nice? That'll teach Owner to believe that de-clawing is barbaric.
December 22 - January 19 - Tomorrow is Owner's big job interview. Sleep all day today so we're fresh for a wild night of chair tipping and bed hopping.
January 20 - February 18 - The water dish is dirty and Owner is too lazy to clean it. Drop some food in it before tipping it over onto the Oriental rug.
February 19 - March 20 - A good day to eat that Christmas tree tinsel that fell behind the couch last December, just so he can drag it behind his butt when Owner's dinner guests arrive.